Floors

I wish to be forgotten –
let me melt into the floor,
become one with a substance
I thought nothing of before.

I’ll dissolve into the hardwood –
become part of the grain,
until I’m unrecognizable
merely part of the stain.

I’ll spend years in silence –
listening in your halls,
residing beneath your feet
a foundation for footfalls.

You’ll forget I was a person –
I’ll only be a floor,
made to be taken for granted
stain and grain forevermore.

~

This poem is meant to illustrate what it feels like to give up your voice and/or identity within a relationship or life situation. Certain personality types and ways of “domestication” teach this type of thinking. If you feel this way it’s up to you to change it. To stand up and make your voice known. When brought up in a culture or house where voices are lost it is a default mechanism reaction. Quite honestly it is something I am working hard against in my own life. Having a voice is important. Pushing off the martyr role of allowing oneself to be taken for granted and used is revolutionary for some, even unbelieveable. But it is possible to reclaim your voice, or even find it for the first time.

~ Nikki Anne Schmutz





 

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3 thoughts on “Floors”

  1. Nikki, I can relate to this poem and it is heartbreaking to know that so many people have found themselves in this situation: ‘I wish to be forgotten -/let me melt into the floor’. The damage that this does to a person’s self-esteem can and does take many years to repair.This is a poem that offers a voice to those who have experienced/are experiencing such a sad state of affairs.

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